Sight for sore eyes

Yesterday was one of those glorious days where I saw two truly fine and fascinating specimens of humanity. Sadly, I didn't get photo evidence of either, so words shall have to suffice. It was a treat, and I'll tell you why.

First, I was driving about town in my tank top, windows rolled down, warm breeze blowing through my locks, when I spotted something . . . unusual.

I did the double take. And it was just what I had hoped it was. Sadly, the moment happened so fast I couldn't take a picture of it, so let me provide the original idea so you get a taste of my enjoyment:


It's appropriately called The Flying Wedge. And I truly never thought I would see one of these on anything other than Kath & Kim, another planet, or Solange Knowles. BUT I DID. Some twenty year old indy hipster was just strutting down the sidewalk with The Flying Wedge. How? WHY?! Had I not been going on the opposite direction on a busy street, I would have pulled over and ran after her, posing as a writer for some fashion magazine with a few questions. Alas.

Second incident.

I was at the gym. And you know what that means.

Hot dude.

I walked in, and there he was in all his glory, working his triceps. I drooled a little and continued to walk past him. And I ALMOST mustered the courage to look at him in the face so I could finally ask him about his ever-growing tattoo. But then I chickened out, as usual.

Well.

I was doing some hamstring/quad/whatever leg lifts strategically in his general vicinity. And I was conveniently "watching" the TV so I could look at him, secretly, out of the corner of my eye. Because I had zero interest in the actual basketball game when I could watch rippling muscles in action.

And then angels descended and sprinkled Luck dust all over me, because he started to walk RIGHT towards me and LIFTED UP HIS SHIRT to wipe the sweat off his divine face and I got a full shot of his incredible abs, akin to this:



Have you just reached for some ice and a fan to cool yourself off? You're not alone. In fact, when I was blessed with The Ab Shot, I stared. Shamelessly. Like I always do. And he knows that I did, because I was RIGHT THERE. But I don't even care, because despite what you may think, I KNOW that expose was meant for me.