I was reading the news today and I found it quite disconcerting. Everything is Obama this and McCain that. DROLL. Who cares about the "threat" of Iran or the "problems" of Darfur? And what the crap is Freddy Mac and Fannie Mae? Why are we even talking about them? BOR-ing.
Hey! Humanity! When did you get to be so lame? Remember the good ole days? Like the Plague. That was eventful. Or the Bay of Pigs? WHOOPS. Why aren't we doing more cool stuff? We have the technology! Sure we raced the Russians to the moon... and then what? That was the end! SO anticlimactical. Why aren't we racing them to see who can make the biggest skating rink out of Jell-O on the North Pole? Then if we battled over it, it would have to be on ice skates, and THAT would be awesome. Like extreme hockey where everything goes.
Even the Olympics are sissy. Have you watched those races? Yeah, it's so fun watching those girly-men "run" around the track a gazillion times. Maybe they would run better if tigers were set loose on them. And maybe I could watch the pole vaulting without gauging my eyes out if they were being flung over a pit of alligators. Then those Asians on the Spike channel wouldn't have the corner market on "entertainment."
No wonder people are so depressed these days.
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3 comments:
Taradise.....
In times of trouble I too have sought to escape the monotony of our nightly "news". I have found my solace in two often dark areas of the world. The first is the IFOCE or International federation of championship eating as it is commonly known. There people of all races, ages and sizes come together to showcase true talent. Who else could eat 12lbs. of cheesecake in one setting and keep it down? You don't see anyone else doing that.
And second, the off beaten path of ESPN 8. Or whatever large number of ESPN you can find. I gorge myself on lumberjacking and strongest man and when I'm lucky I'll catch some bowling and trick pool shots.
Don't get down my friend. If it's pole-vaulting you want then look up the norwegian pole-vaulting which is far more entertaining than any "olympic" pole-vaulting. God rest your weary soul young child.
brillant analysis on the society of 2008.
so when are you going to write a book? I would buy it.
Tara. You are hilarious. Love your blog.
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