August 28, 1959

The Twins: Aunt Tamy (left), Mom (right)

And you wonder where I get it from.


Happy Happiest of birthdays, dear mum and aunty T! No one would ever guess that you're FIFTY. And now everyone knows!

But really, Deby, you are kind and supportive and hard-working and funny with a contagious laugh, and you're a minimalist guilt-tripper, which I appreciate. And now I am inspired to write a haiku:

smell of warm cookies
and Christmas decorations
i think of you truly


Enjoy the BIG 5-0!

Let's go down the Disco!

Do you ever wonder what I do with my day when I'm not working? Of course not, but just in case the question has ever arisen in your mind, here is the answer:




I would love to make Ulises the Bunda-Bunda my Latino Lover.

In fact, I'm shaking hips to this video RIGHT NOW, because he will only want a girl who can shake it right along with him.

Post Script

As of last night, Hot Dude has returned!

See, it pays to shed one's dignity and publicly apologize and plead the return of a man one doesn't know but loves anyway.

Missing: C. the Muscle

Dear Hot Dude from The Gym,

Wither hast thou gone? It's been months since last I saw your lovely smile and huge tattoo. Did you start going in the mornings because of a recently acquired girlfriend whom you spend your evenings flexing to? Are you touring exotic countries with trust fund money from a deceased relative? Have you stopped coming because CNN is STILL exploring the apparent mysteries of Michael Jackson's death, thereby disrupting your very strenuous lifting exercises? Because I know how you loved to watch the game on the big tv overlooking your bench press machine, and I can see how the plethora of MJ pictures might . . . you know, disturb you a bit.

Or did you perhaps find out that I insinuated you might be on the feminine side? Because it was only a CONJECTURE - and if that is my offense, then I TAKE IT ALL BACK! I'm sorry I questioned your testosterone levels, and your matchy-matchy outfit with whats-his-face. Please, I AM BEGGING YOU, come back! Come back to your beloved weights and love us again. My time there without you has been so boring and lacking in pretend romantic tension.


Longingly awaiting your return,

T

HELLO August!

You know, it can take a lot out of you: waking up to the sound of waves crashing on the beach, picking out a trashy romance novel for the day, laying on the beach for 6 hours, jumping into the ocean when I felt a bit overheated, and ending the day with a Diet Coke and some Law & Order. I mean, really - those couple weeks were exhausting.

Now I'm back, and I've decided that there is no better way to get back into the swing of things than to make some "Summer: Part II" resolutions. Feel free to join me in these:

1. Wear less clothing. It brings such a sense of freedom - which is, after all, what this country is all about. Remember the days when you would wear your bathing suit ALL summer long without taking it off? Well, that's what I'm bringing back - MINUS THE SUIT.

2. I'm probably not going to go see G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra. Sorry. But you can go if you want to. Although I might reconsider if I hear that it is really so awesomely bad that it's good, like Pathfinder.

3. I'm going to go to Baker. Yes, you read that right. Baker "Pit-Stop-In-Hell" California, because I have a hunch that that is where the chupacabra is hanging out.

4. Make a new friend. It's time for that once-a-year effort to meet someone new.

5. Get a real job. I think about my current situation about 75% of my waking life. I am going to reduce that to 50%, and read more YA Fiction with my extra time.

Wish me luck!